what we keep

Michelle really didn't want to see this work out with Stan and Lux.  There was a little bit of her who still wanted Stan for herself. And yet, she didn't want to see him with miserable with her, either.

"I know what she's doing to you." Michelle would explain all to Stan, if she needed too. She cornered him in the storage unit while Sam went to get more boxes.

"Oh really." Stan gave her that little happy sad look of his as if she was teasing him .

"I'm serious. She's using you." Michelle looked at him blankly.

"But I'm pretty used to be being used, 'chelle?" He gave her a dead stare. "First it was Caity, then you, I'm pretty sure I've got the hang of it now."

"But don't you want to be happy?" She was puzzled. Wasn't there someone out there that he could wait for, besides Lux or her?

"I'm happy." He teased slightly with a wince, as if she didn't have to worry about him. "Are you happy, Michelle?"

Michelle hugged herself tight then. She wanted to be. Yes, she'd used Sam in the beginning to get back at Tony. And then..then he was really nice to her. She had to admit, she thought Sam was beautiful. And she couldn't help but want to see where it went with him. But now, they'd be alone. Sure, she could go back home to an empty house, party all summer if she wanted. Yet it would be so empty in the end.

"I want to be." She knew she could if she let herself. It was so drastic, this move. Lux and Stan together. It couldn't last. It wouldn't. And when it was over, she'd have to be the big sister he needed.

She hadn't returned any messages to Tony. As far as she knew, she was completely off the radar to him. Michelle intended to keep it that way.